There were many things happened lately.
The thing that makes me think the most was (and still is) when I got the news from my friend regard to my very best friend who entered an ER (Emergency Room) at one hospital in Bandung last Wednesday night. I heard it a little bit late on the next morning.
The news was so crisscross and makes me didn’t know which news was the right one.
So I called up some friends to see him and make sure if his condition. And Handi was there to give the support I need.

When finally Handi gave me his first report, I could get a little calm because I know there will be a friend whom I could trust to be with him and send me reports on my friend’s conditions.

I couldn’t go to Bandung until Friday evening. But there was all the changes happened.
I tried my best to be on Bandung as soon as possible. But what I found was that his family insists to take him to Jakarta. Well… I feel a little bit upset there, because the doctors (there were four doctors tries to find out his condition) still didn’t know yet the cause of his illness. When the brother kept a stiff upper lip to take him to Jakarta, the doctors didn’t give the approval to do that. He didn’t respond anything! He was conscious but no response.
I finally arrived at Bandung and met Handi very soon. I take him and Aan to Jayakarta hotel to met Dona whom wanted to know about our friend’s conditions too. And when we talk about the matter, the brother sent Handi a text message told us that the doctor in Jakarta has no objection for the family to take him to Makassar on the next day. WTH ?!?!?

So, it was 22.30. They leave the hospital at 19.30. It would need more than 2 hours from Bandung to the brother’s house. Hmmm… what a great doctor could make a very fast decision in the evening… There were four doctors tried to find out and in 2 days they still haven’t found anything!
Then I made a call to Makassar, and I got the news that they will take off from Jakarta in the morning. Hmmm… they already have that ticket on their hand even before the brother went from Jakarta to Bandung, that is what I guessed. Handi told me that the brother’s cell phone was runs out of battery. So, it means that the message must have been sent from his house because he had re-charged the cell phone before sending the message.

Ahh… they are his family, what can I do?
But the thing that made me so down was because I didn’t tried harder or made a quick decision to go to Bandung as soon as I heard the news. I didn’t even have the chance to see him yet! Arghhh… will he feel disappointed because I couldn’t be there when he might need me?

O well… He is at Makassar now, I still wait for the news (hope it would be good news), I wish him to get well very soon.

But that was not the only things that made me feel down lately. There were (and is) my job which I think so unfocused. Make another crisscross thing again in my brain. And this superior seems to be incapable of being a superior.
And when the news from Bandung came, I was so confused with my work and workloads, so I really have to choose between following my heart to go to Bandung or stay and do my responsibility. Not an easy choice. And there were one of my best friend who couldn’t buy a little time to give to his friend whom lying in the hospital. I was hoped he could come to see him and gave his report because he is the one I trust. But, well… a little bit disappointed to him at that time. Two days and never had the chance only to come and give his friend a little support.

The other things…. Hmmm… it’s OK. I know… I understand… But when everything come in bad ways, those negative thinking will shows themselves, and I was so down because of this matter. But, now… everything should be fine. I just miss her.

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